How to Hate a Narcissist

“I didn’t set out to write this book; in many ways, this book wrote itself. It grew out of my own experiences—experiences I wouldn’t wish on anyone but ones I know far too many people share. The confusion, the self-doubt, the anger, the heartbreak—these emotions consumed me as I tried to make sense of what had happened after being entangled with a narcissist. For a long time, I searched for answers, for guidance, for some kind of roadmap to help me process the whirlwind of emotions that seemed impossible to untangle.

This book is the second in the How To… Narcissist series, a journey I began with How to Love a Narcissist. In that first book, I explored the complexities of trying to maintain a relationship with a narcissist—understanding their behavior, navigating their tactics, and coming to terms with what that dynamic means for your own well-being. That work was about survival and coping, about understanding the narcissist in your life.

But this book is different.

How to Hate a Narcissist takes a step further into the personal and emotional aftermath of narcissistic abuse. It’s about you. It’s about what happens when the illusion shatters, when the mask falls, and you’re left to pick up the pieces of your identity, your trust, and your self-worth. It’s about embracing the anger and hatred that bubble to the surface—not as something to fear or suppress but as the first necessary steps toward reclaiming your life.

I wrote this book because I know how isolating and overwhelming these emotions can be. Society often tells us to “forgive and forget,” to “move on” from our pain as quickly as possible. But healing isn’t about rushing to the finish line; it’s about feeling, processing, and understanding what’s happening within you. Sometimes, that process begins with rage. Sometimes, it begins with hatred. And that’s okay.

In this book, I hope to offer you what I wished I’d had: permission. Permission to feel everything—the anger, the grief, the resentment, the exhaustion. Permission to validate your own experience, to take up space, to not rush toward a resolution just because others think you should. Most importantly, I hope this book serves as a reminder that healing doesn’t have to look one specific way. Whether you find peace through forgiveness, detachment, or simply living a life free of the narcissist’s influence, your journey is yours to define.”

This is not just a book about anger; it’s a book about transformation. It’s about turning those raw, overwhelming emotions into tools for growth, self-discovery, and resilience. It’s about rediscovering your voice, reclaiming your reality, and rebuilding the parts of yourself that may have been overshadowed or broken.

If you’re here, reading this, you’ve already taken an important step: you’re choosing to confront what you’ve been through and begin the process of healing. I’m honored to walk this path with you, not as an expert standing above you but as someone who has been in the trenches and knows what it feels like to claw your way out.

You are stronger than you realize, and your story doesn’t end here. Let’s take this journey together.”